115 Jokes For Cousins: Make Family Time Fun!

Are you ready for some serious laughter with your family? Get ready to discover the secret to making family time super fun and exciting. With 115 awesome jokes to share, you’ll be the coolest cousin ever!

Laughter is the best way to bring everyone together, and we’ve got you covered with the most amazing jokes to tell your cousins. From silly puns to hilarious one-liners, these jokes will have you and your family laughing out loud in no time. Get set to create unforgettable memories with your loved ones!

Best Puns & Jokes

Puns and jokes about cousins can be a fun way to celebrate the unique bond between these relatives.

Whether it’s a play on words or a clever observation, these jokes are sure to bring a smile to everyone’s face.

• My cousin is so tech-savvy, he’s always a byte ahead of me in our family’s cyber competitions.
• Why did my cousin bring a ladder to the party, because he heard the drinks were on the house.
• My cousin is a master baker, but his career is in a bit of a crumbly state right now.
• I told my cousin to meet me at the corner of walk and don’t walk, and he said that’s a pretty cross intersection.
• My cousin’s dog is so smart, it’s paws-itive it’s the top dog in our family.
• What did my cousin say when I asked him to help me move, “bro, I’m a little car-ried away with my own stuff”.
• My cousin’s cooking is so bad, it’s a recipe for disaster, but I still eat it because it’s a family heirloom.
• Why did my cousin become a musician, because he wanted to be a treble maker.
• I asked my cousin to help me with my math homework, and he said don’t worry, we’ll just have to al-gebra-ize the problem.
• My cousin’s cat joined a band, and now it’s the purr-cussionist.
• What do you call my cousin when he’s sleeping, a couch potato, because he’s always a little fried.
• My cousin’s fashion sense is so unique, he’s the only one I know who can rock a plaid and polka dot combo.
• Why did my cousin go to the doctor, he’d a little pig-gy-back problem, turns out it was just a hamhock issue.
• I tried to get my cousin to go to the gym with me, but he’s a little flabby about committing to it.
• My cousin’s so funny, he’s a joke-erator, always making us laugh.
• Why did my cousin bring a magnet to the party, he wanted to attract some attention.
• What do you call my cousin when he’s driving, a wheel good time, because he’s always spinning out of control.
• My cousin’s so good at soccer, he’s a real kick, always scoring goals.
• I asked my cousin to help me build a birdhouse, and he said that’s a pretty fowl project.
• My cousin’s a great dancer, he’s always stepping up to the beat.
• What did my cousin say when I asked him to go for a run, “you’re just trying to tire me out”.
• My cousin’s a master of disguise, he’s always masking his true identity.
• Why did my cousin go to the beauty parlor, he wanted a paws-itively gorgeous haircut.
• My cousin’s so clever, he’s always inventing new words, like “smog” which is a combination of smoke and fog.
• I asked my cousin to help me with my computer, and he said don’t worry, it’s just a byte-sized problem.
• My cousin’s a great swimmer, he’s always making a splash.
• What do you call my cousin when he’s playing video games, a game-changer, because he’s always on a roll.
• My cousin’s so good at telling jokes, he’s a real comic relief.
• Why did my cousin go to the amusement park, to have a roller-coaster of emotions.
• My cousin’s a great cook, he’s always stirring up something delicious.
• I asked my cousin to help me with my garden, and he said that’s a growing concern.
• My cousin’s so good at playing chess, he’s always checking my moves.
• What did my cousin say when I asked him to go for a bike ride, “you’re just trying to pedal me to exhaustion”.
• My cousin’s a great artist, he’s always drawing outside the lines.
• Why did my cousin become a scientist, because he wanted to experiment with his career.
• My cousin’s so good at playing pranks, he’s always pulling my leg.
• I asked my cousin to help me with my puzzle, and he said that’s a pretty knotty problem.
• My cousin’s a great musician, he’s always hitting the high notes.
• What do you call my cousin when he’s eating, a food critic, because he’s always chewing over the menu.
• My cousin’s so clever, he’s always cracking the code.
• Why did my cousin go to the library, to get to the root of the problem.
• My cousin’s a great athlete, he’s always running with the pack.
• I asked my cousin to help me with my bookshelf, and he said that’s a pretty novel idea.
• My cousin’s so good at telling stories, he’s a real page-turner.
• What did my cousin say when I asked him to go for a hike, “you’re just trying to trail behind me”.
• My cousin’s a great problem-solver, he’s always finding the missing piece.
• Why did my cousin become a teacher, because he wanted to grade his students on their performance.
• My cousin’s so funny, he’s always making me laugh with his egg-cellent jokes.
• I asked my cousin to help me with my photography, and he said that’s a pretty developed skill.
• My cousin’s a great singer, he’s always in tune with his audience.

Funny One-Liners & Wordplay

Funny one-liners and wordplay are great ways to bring humor and creativity into conversations, making them more engaging and entertaining for everyone involved.

The use of clever language and unexpected twists can add layers of humor and interest, making these forms of jokes particularly enjoyable.

• When I told my cousin I was reading a book on anti-gravity, she couldn’t put it down, and that was the point.
• My cousin’s cat joined a band, and now it’s the purr-cussionist, which is just a cat-astrophe of a different kind.
• I asked my cousin to bring a ladder to the party, and she said it was a step in the right direction, but honestly, it was just a high expectation.
• Why did my cousin’s banana go to the doctor, because it wasn’t peeling well, which is a fruit-less concern if you ask me.
• My cousin’s egg went to therapy, and it was cracking under the pressure, a problem that’s hard to beat.
• When my cousin’s pen broke up with her pencil, it was a sharp move, leaving their relationship a little drawn out.
• My cousin told me to stop making so many baking jokes, but I couldn’t help myself, I’m a sucker for a good loaf.
• What did my cousin’s clock say to her when she woke up late, you’re always running behind, which is just about time someone told her.
• My cousin became a baker because he kneaded the dough, and it was a recipe for success, rising to the occasion.
• I told my cousin she was drawing her eyebrows too high, and she looked surprised, which was the brow goal all along.
• My cousin’s computer got infected with a virus, and now it’s feeling a little glitchy, which is just a bug in the system.
• Why did my cousin’s scarecrow win an award, because he was outstanding in his field, a-maize-ing in his abilities.
• My cousin went to the doctor and said, “Doc, I’ve got a problem, I’ve been feeling like a chicken,” and the doctor said, “Don’t worry, it’s just a fowl mood.”
• When my cousin’s mushroom got invited to all the parties, he was a fun-gi, the life of the party, sporing a good time.
• What do you call my cousin’s fake noodle, an impasta, which is just a saucy impersonation.
• My cousin’s orange stopped in the middle of the road, and when I asked why, it said it ran out of juice, a fruit-less endeavor.
• I asked my cousin why she brought a magnet to the party, and she said she wanted to attract some attention, which was a polarizing move.
• My cousin’s bicycle fell over, and when I asked what happened, it said it was two-tired, a bit of a cycle of exhaustion.
• Why did my cousin’s coffee file a police report, because it got mugged, a bitter experience.
• My cousin’s cat is a great listener, it purr-suades me to talk, and that’s the cat’s meow.
• What did my cousin’s wall say to the other wall, meet you at the corner, a real meeting of minds, or should I say, a wall-to-wall conversation.
• My cousin’s dog went to the vet, and the vet said, “I’m paws-itive he’ll be okay,” which was a doggone good diagnosis.
• Why did my cousin’s baker go to the bank, he needed dough, a loafing good time at the bank.
• I asked my cousin why she was wearing a watch on both hands, and she said she wanted to be on time for everything, a timely fashion statement.
• My cousin’s potato chip went to the doctor, and the doctor said, “You’re just feeling a little crispy,” a snack-sized problem.
• What do you call my cousin’s can opener that doesn’t work, a can’t opener, which is just a bit of a tin problem.
• My cousin’s pencil broke up with the eraser, and now it’s a sharp move, a pointed breakup.
• My cousin’s chicken went to the doctor, and the doctor said, “Don’t worry, it’s just a fowl cough,” which was an egg-cellent diagnosis.
• Why did my cousin’s math book look so sad, because it had too many problems, a real equation for depression.
• My cousin’s banana split because it wasn’t peeling well, a fruit-less relationship that didn’t make the cut.
• I told my cousin she was sucking the life out of her lollipop, and she said that’s the point, a sucker for a good treat.
• My cousin’s rabbit went to the doctor, and the doctor said, “You’ve got hare-loss,” a fur-bulous problem, indeed.
• My cousin’s apple joined the gym to get some core strength, a fruit-ful workout routine.
• Why did my cousin’s toaster go to the doctor, it was feeling crumby, a real bread-winner of a problem.
• My cousin’s cat became a detective, and now it’s a purr-fect sleuth, solving crimes one paw at a time.
• What did my cousin’s beach say when the tide came in, long time no sea, a shore thing, indeed.
• My cousin’s computer mouse was having a ball, it was a mouse-tastic time, clicking away with joy.
• My cousin went to the doctor and said, “Doc, I feel like a chicken and an egg,” and the doctor said, “Don’t worry, it’s just an egg-xistential crisis.”
• Why did my cousin’s orange juice carton go to therapy, it was feeling boxed in, a fruit-less concern, indeed.
• My cousin’s dog is a great dancer, it’s always paws-ing to the music, a doggone good time on the dance floor.
• My cousin’s pen is better than my pencil, it’s always a sharp writer, a pointed difference, indeed.
• What do you call my cousin’s group of cows playing instruments, a moo-sical band, which is udderly amazing.
• My cousin’s bicycle is sad because it’s two-tired, a real cycle of depression, indeed.

Top Witty Puns

Top witty puns are a great way to add humor to any conversation, especially when it comes to jokes for cousins. These clever jokes rely on wordplay, making them a fun and lighthearted way to connect with others, and here are some examples:

• When I told my cousin I was reading a book on anti-gravity, she couldn’t put it down because the puns were so witty.
• My cousin’s cat joined a band and became the purr-cussionist, which was a pretty witty career move.
• Why did my cousin bring a ladder to the party, because she heard the drinks were on the house and that was a witty excuse.
• I asked my cousin to help me catch a cow, but she said she was having a beef with puns that day and didn’t want to moo-ve.
• My cousin went to the doctor and said she’d a chicken bone stuck in her throat, but it was just a fowl excuse for not wanting to talk about her witty puns.
• What did my cousin say when I asked her to go to the beach, she said shell yes because she loved witty beach puns.
• My cousin became a master baker because she kneaded the dough and that was a pretty witty reason.
• I told my cousin to meet me at the park, but she said she was having trouble tree-mending her schedule and couldn’t come up with a witty excuse.
• My cousin’s dog went to the vet and got a paws-itive diagnosis, which was a witty way to look at it.
• Why did my cousin bring a magnet to the party, because she wanted to attract some attention with her witty joke.
• My cousin said she was feeling egg-cellent today, which was a witty way to describe her mood.
• What do you call my cousin’s fake spider, a wit-spider because it was a witty joke.
• My cousin went to the gym to get some egg-cellent abs, but ended up with a fowl temper because she didn’t like the witty jokes there.
• Why did my cousin go to the doctor with a piece of broccoli, because she wasn’t feeling so well and needed some witty advice.
• My cousin is a baker and makes great bread, but she’s always feeling crumby about her witty jokes.
• What did my cousin say to the pizza delivery guy, she said we’re having a dough-lightful time and that was a witty response.
• My cousin is reading a book on eclipses, and I told her to moon-light as an astronomer, which was a witty suggestion.
• Why did my cousin bring a compass to the party, because she wanted to navigate the witty conversations.
• My cousin went to the beauty parlor and asked for a paws-itively gorgeous haircut, which was a witty request.
• What do you call my cousin’s can opener, a can-do attitude because it was a witty name.
• My cousin said she was an egg-spert at making omelets, which was a witty claim.
• Why did my cousin go to the amusement park, because she heard it was a whale of a time and she loved witty puns.
• My cousin’s dog is a great singer, and I told her to get him a paws-ition as a musician, which was a witty idea.
• What did my cousin say when I asked her to go for a walk, she said she was all ears because she loved witty jokes.
• My cousin is a great dancer and always spins a good tale, which was a witty way to describe her moves.
• Why did my cousin bring a torch to the party, because she wanted to enlighten the witty conversations.
• My cousin went to the doctor and said she’d a bat-tery of tests, which was a witty way to describe her medical exams.
• What do you call my cousin’s favorite mouse, a mouse-cellent dancer because it was a witty name.
• My cousin is a great cook and makes egg-straordinary meals, which was a witty way to describe her cooking.
• Why did my cousin go to the theater, because she heard it was a play on words and she loved witty puns.
• My cousin’s cat is a great actor, and I told her to get him a purr-fect role, which was a witty suggestion.
• What did my cousin say when I asked her to go to the store, she said she was in a bit of a pickle because she didn’t have any witty excuses.
• My cousin went to the gym and got a latte strength, which was a witty way to describe her workout.
• Why did my cousin bring a flower to the party, because she wanted to branch out and meet new people with her witty jokes.
• My cousin is a great musician and always strikes a chord, which was a witty way to describe her music.
• What do you call my cousin’s favorite pen, a pen-omenal writer because it was a witty name.

Best Jokes & Puns for Instagram

Best jokes and puns for Instagram are a great way to increase engagement and followers, and there are countless options to choose from to make your content stand out.

From witty one-liners to humorous observations, jokes about Instagram can be tailored to fit any style or tone, making them versatile for various audiences.

• When posting a joke about Instagram on Instagram, the irony is that you’re probably seeking likes from people who are scrolling mindlessly, but the joke itself is about how everyone is scrolling mindlessly.
• Why did the Instagram influencer bring a ladder to the party, because they wanted to take their following to the next level.
• The Instagram user’s account was so full of cat pictures that it became the purr-fect example of why you shouldn’t let your pet pick your posts.
• Instagram’s algorithm is like a bad DJ, it always cuts off the good stuff and leaves you with a bunch of irrelevant content.
• Why do Instagram models always pose in front of luxury cars, because they want to shift their brand into high gear.
• What did the Instagram filter say to the selfie, you’re always so filtered, can’t you just be raw for once.
• If Instagram were a person, it would be a teenager, always changing its mind and trying to be trendy.
• Posting a joke on Instagram is like throwing a stone into a lake, it makes a splash, but the ripples eventually fade away.
• Why did the comedian’s Instagram account go viral, because his jokes were picture perfect.
• What do you call an Instagram post with no likes, a tree falling in the forest with no one around to hear it.
• The best way to get more followers on Instagram is to post a joke that’s so funny, it becomes a meme and memes are the currency of the internet.
• When you finally get to 1,000 followers on Instagram, you realize it’s not about the number, but about the engagement, and then you start over, trying to make them laugh.
• An Instagram joke about food is the biggest tease, because it makes you hungry, but all you can do is eat the view.
• Why do Instagram comedians love using puns, because puns are the highest form of wordplay, and wordplay is the sincerest form of flattery.
• What do you call an Instagram comedian who can’t make you laugh, a joke in itself, because comedy is subjective, and what’s funny to one person mightn’t be funny to another.
• In the world of Instagram, timing is everything, especially when posting jokes, because you have to catch the audience at the right moment to maximize engagement.
• Instagram is like a never-ending comedy club, where every day is open mic night, and anyone can take the stage.
• If your joke on Instagram doesn’t get any likes, just remember, comedy is a numbers game, and you can’t win them all.
• What did the comedian say to Instagram, you’re the perfect platform, because I can post, and if my joke bombs, I can just delete it, and it’s like it never happened.
• The toughest part about being an Instagram comedian is that your jokes have to be 10 times funnier than they’d be in real life, because the competition is fierce.
• Posting jokes on Instagram is a form of therapy, because if you can make others laugh, you can laugh too, and laughter is the best medicine.
• The secret to making a joke go viral on Instagram is to find the universal truth, because people laugh at what they can relate to.
• Why do comedians on Instagram love using hashtags, because hashtags are the ultimate punchline, directing you to more of the same humor.
• What’s the difference between a joke and a meme on Instagram, one makes you laugh, and the other makes you laugh and share.
• The Instagram algorithm is like a tough crowd, you have to work hard to impress it, and even then, there are no guarantees.
• An Instagram joke without a visual is like a meal without seasoning, it might fill you up, but it won’t leave you wanting more.
• If you want to succeed as an Instagram comedian, you have to think outside the box, or in this case, the frame.
• Instagram is the playground of comedians, where the jokes are the swings, and the likes are the pushes that keep you going higher.
• What do you call a comedian who posts jokes on Instagram every day, consistent, because in comedy, timing and consistency are key.
• When an Instagram comedian’s joke falls flat, they just say, well, that one was a pilot, and pilots are meant to test the waters.
• The art of crafting a joke for Instagram is in the editing, because sometimes less is more, and the less you say, the more you make people laugh.
• Posting a funny joke on Instagram is like dropping a bomb, it makes a big impact, but the aftermath is what really matters.
• The reason why comedians love Instagram is that it’s a platform where a joke can change someone’s day, and if you’re lucky, it might even change their life.
• What did the Instagram filter say to the comedian, you don’t need me, your jokes are already in focus.
• In the game of Instagram comedy, the player with the most likes wins, but the real victory is making people laugh, regardless of the numbers.
• The best Instagram jokes are the ones that make you laugh and think, because comedy should challenge you, and not just tickle your funny bone.
• An Instagram joke that’s too long is like a movie that’s too short, it doesn’t quite hit the mark, because timing is everything.
• Why do comedians on Instagram use so many hashtags, because they’re fishing for laughs, and the more lines you cast, the more likely you’re to catch something.
• The ultimate goal of an Instagram comedian is to make the world laugh, one joke at a time, because laughter is contagious, and it can change the world.
• What’s the best way to tell if an Instagram joke is funny, if people are laughing, sharing, and coming back for more, because comedy is a journey, not a destination.
• When a comedian on Instagram finds their niche, they stick to it, because in comedy, it’s not about being funny to everyone, but about being funny to someone.
• The difference between a good joke and a great joke on Instagram is that a great joke stays with you long after you’ve scrolled past it.

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Conclusion

You’ll laugh out loud with these 115 jokes, creating unforgettable memories with your cousins. Get ready for hilarious puns, funny one-liners, and witty wordplay that’ll make family time a blast. You’ll be the coolest cousin ever, sharing jokes that bring smiles and giggles. Have a blast sharing them, and make your family time utterly amazing!