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132+ Funny Rum Puns That Will Lift Your Spirits

By: Richard J. Gross
Updated On: April 5, 2025

Are you ready for a laugh? We have a big collection of funny rum puns that will make you smile. They are clever and perfect for sharing on social media.

Get ready to “rum-inate” on some hilarious wordplay that’ll lift your spirits and make your day better. You can use these funny puns to make your friends laugh and have a good time. What’s your favorite rum pun, let’s find out together!

Best Puns & Jokes

Rum puns are a great way to add some humor to any conversation, and they can be used in a variety of settings, from casual gatherings to themed parties.

With a little creativity, you can come up with some hilarious and clever rum puns that are sure to impress your friends and family, and here are some examples:

  • I told my wife she was drawing her rum cocktails, but she just couldn’t drink to that.
  • Rum and coke is like a bad relationship, it’s a classic but gets old after a while.
  • Why did the rum go to therapy, because it was feeling a little mixed up.
  • What did the rum say to the coke, you’re the soda to my spirit.
  • I’m reading a book about rum, it’s a real spirits lifter.
  • Why did the pirate quit his job, he was sick of all the rum-ors.
  • What do you call a bear that loves rum, a grizzly drinker.
  • I went to the doctor and said I’ve been feeling a little rum-ny, he just told me to drink some water.
  • Why did the rum go to the party, because it was a blast.
  • What did the rum say when it ran into its ex, you’re just a mixer to me now.
  • I tried to quit drinking rum, but I just couldn’t teal myself away.
  • Why was the rum in a bad mood, it was having a dark day.
  • What do you call a rum that’s an excellent listener, a bourbon-ified therapist.
  • I’m not a morning person, but rum and coffee are a great way to wake me up.
  • Why did the rum go to the gym, to get some bottle service.
  • What did the rum say when it got old, I’m not getting older I’m just getting aged.
  • I love rum, it’s the spice of life, or should I say the sugar.
  • Why did the rum become a musician, it was great at mixing beats.
  • What do you call a rum that’s a great problem solver, a spirits guide.
  • I went to the store and asked for rum, the clerk said we’re all out, I said that’s a spirits crusher.
  • Why did the rum go to the beauty parlor, it wanted a new mixer.
  • What did the rum say when it got kicked out of the bar, that’s just the way the cookie crumbles.
  • I’m not addicted to rum, I’m just passionately expressing my spirits.
  • Why was the rum so expensive, it was a premium blend.
  • What do you call a rum that loves to sail, a naval spirits.
  • I love rum so much I even put it in my cake, that’s just the icing on the rum.
  • Why did the rum go to the doctor, it had a bad case of the blues.
  • What did the rum say when it saw its friend, long time no sea.
  • I’m not drinking rum, I’m just having a spirits moment.
  • Why did the rum become an actor, it was great at playing a role.
  • What do you call a rum that’s a great dancer, a bottle of fun.
  • I went to the bar and ordered a rum, the bartender said would you like it mixed, I said no I’m a purist.
  • Why did the rum go to the mountains, to get to the high spirits.
  • What did the rum say when it ran into its enemy, you’re just a bitter rival.

Funny One-Liners & Wordplay

Funny one-liners and wordplay about rum puns are a great way to add some humor to any conversation. With a dash of creativity, these jokes can be both clever and entertaining, making them perfect for sharing with friends and family, so here are some:

  • The bartender’s rum-themed jokes were so good, they were the spirit of the party.
  • When I told my wife she drew her eyebrows too high, she looked surprised, but after a few rums, I was the one who was raised.
  • I rum-maged through my closet and found an old bottle of rum, which was the highlight of my day.
  • Why did the rum go to therapy, because it was feeling a little mixed.
  • The rum was so strong, it made me forget my troubles, but then I remembered I’d to pay for it.
  • What did the rum say to the coke, let’s get mixed up and have some fun.
  • I tried to start a rum-tasting club, but it was a spirits-less endeavor.
  • The rum punch was so good, it knocked me off my feet, literally.
  • Why did I bring a ladder to the rum party, because I heard the drinks were on the house.
  • What do you call a bear that loves rum, a grizzly mixer.
  • The rum cake was so moist, it made me want to drink more rum.
  • I went to the rum distillery and saw how they made the rum, it was a real barrel of laughs.
  • Why did the rum go to the doctor, it had a little Spirits problem.
  • The rum and coke were in a relationship, but it was a mixed marriage.
  • What did the rum say when it ran into its ex, you’re just a mix of memories now.
  • I rum-maged through the fridge and found a bottle of rum, it was a cool discovery.
  • The rum was so smooth, it slipped right down, like a spirit in the night.
  • Why did the rum go on a date, because it was looking for a good mix.
  • What do you call a rum that’s having an identity crisis, a spirit-ual awakening.
  • The rum was so strong, it made me see double, but then I remembered I was just seeing things.
  • I tried to start a rum-of-the-month subscription, but it was a bottle-necked business.
  • Why did the rum join a band, because it was a natural mixer.
  • What did the rum say to the ice, you’re always so cool, but I’m the one who’s hot.
  • The rum and I’d a fight, but we’re on spirits again now.
  • Why did the rum go to the gym, to get some bottle-body.
  • What do you call a rum that’s an excellent listener, a spirits-ual advisor.
  • I took my rum to the party, and it was a real smash hit.
  • The rum was so good, it made me want to dance the rum-ba.
  • Why did the rum go to the beauty parlor, it wanted a new bottle-do.
  • What did the rum say when it got old, I’m not getting older, I’m just getting more mature.
  • I rum-maged through the store and found a great deal on rum, it was a steal.
  • The rum and I are in a long-distance relationship, but we’re still on the rocks.
  • Why did the rum go to the doctor, it had a bad case of the spirits.
  • What do you call a rum that’s a great problem solver, a mix-master.

Top Witty Puns

Top witty puns are a staple of any good comedy routine, and when it comes to rum, the possibilities are endless. From clever wordplay to situational irony, rum puns can add a splash of humor to any gathering, and here are some examples:

  • The rum enthusiast’s favorite cocktail was a real spirit-lifter, and it always managed to rum-inate on his mind.
  • After a few too many rum punches, the partygoer started to feel like they were in a bit of a pickle, but the rum was still the big dill.
  • The pirate’s love of rum was no secret, and his trusty parrot would often squawk “rum for breakfast” to get the day started.
  • Why did the rum go to therapy, because it was feeling a little mixed up and needed to get to the root of its problems.
  • The rum distiller’s job was a real gas, but someone had to bottle up all that spirit.
  • What did the rum say to the coke, “let’s get mixed up and have a blast”.
  • The rum cake was so moist, it was like a little taste of heaven, and it always left people pining for a rum-ake.
  • In the world of rum, it’s all about the proof, and this particular batch was certainly putting its money where its mouth was.
  • Why did the rum go on a diet, because it wanted to lose some of its proof and become a little more spirits-ual.
  • The best rum puns are always a bit of a groaner, but they’re always in good spirits.
  • What do you call a rum that’s having an identity crisis, a spirits-ual seeker.
  • The rum aficionado’s wine and cheese night was a real grape occasion, but the rum was the real star of the show.
  • Why was the rum always so calm, because it was always just going with the flow and spirits of the moment.
  • If you’re looking for a rum that’s a real treasure, you have to be willing to dig a little deeper and sea what you can find.
  • The rum was so smooth, it was like butter, and it always left people feeling a little nutty.
  • What did the rum say when it ran into its ex, “you’re just a splash in the pan of my life”.
  • The rum cocktail was so popular, it was the mac to everyone’s cheese, and it always left people feeling gouda.
  • Why did the rum go to the doctor, it had a little bug in its system and needed to get rid of the worm.
  • In the world of rum, the possibilities are endless, and you can always rum-mage through the options to find the perfect fit.
  • What do you call a rum that’s an excellent listener, a spirits-ual advisor.
  • The rum was so potent, it was like a shot of espresso, and it always left people feeling a little buzzed.
  • Why did the rum become a bartender, because it was great at mixing things up and stirring the pot.
  • The rum and coke was a match made in heaven, and it always left people feeling like they were on top of the world.
  • What did the rum say to the lemon, “when life gives you lemons, make a rum and coke”.
  • The rum was so versatile, it was like a chameleon, and it could blend in with any crowd.
  • Why did the rum go to the gym, to get a little more toned and buff, and to improve its spirits.
  • In the world of rum, it’s all about the art of the mix, and this particular rum was a masterpiece.
  • What do you call a rum that’s a great problem solver, a spirits-ual advisor.
  • The rum was so invigorating, it was like a cool breeze on a hot summer day, and it always left people feeling a little revitalized.
  • Why did the rum become a musician, because it was great at mixing beats and stirring up the crowd.
  • The rum and ginger was a real showstopper, and it always left people feeling like they were on cloud nine.
  • What did the rum say to the orange, “you’re the juice to my rum”.
  • The rum was so sophisticated, it was like a fine wine, and it always left people feeling a little classy.
  • Why did the rum go to the beauty parlor, to get a little more polished and refined, and to improve its spirits.
  • In the world of rum, it’s all about the experience, and this particular rum was a real treat.
  • What do you call a rum that’s a great storyteller, a spirits-ual guru.

Best Jokes & Puns for Instagram

When it comes to rum puns for Instagram, the goal is to craft jokes that are both amusing and engaging, perfect for capturing the attention of followers. By leveraging wordplay, situational irony, or unexpected associations related to rum and its culture, these jokes can bring a smile to anyone’s face and make for great Instagram content.

As I tried to take a photo of my rum cocktail for Instagram, I realized I was struggling to focus because the bar was filled with spirits and my camera was having a rum time.

My attempt to create the perfect rum joke for Instagram was a bit of a rum-inated mess, but at least I didn’t spirits away my sense of humor.

Why did the rum go to therapy and then post about it on Instagram, because it was feeling a little mixed up and wanted to distill its emotions.

After drinking a rum cocktail, I tried to take a selfie for Instagram, but my face was so rumpled I looked like I’d been put through a blender and not in a good, fruity kind of way.

I decided to rum-mage through my closet for a Hawaiian shirt to wear in my next Instagram post, because when you’re drinking rum, the more colorful, the better, right.

The rum took a shot for an Instagram story, but it was a bit of a dark shot, even for a dark rum, and it really needed some captions to lighten the mood.

My friend and I’d a rum-ble over who could come up with the best rum pun for our Instagram captions, and let’s just say it got a little heated, or should I say, distilled.

The rum went viral on Instagram after it started making dad jokes, and people couldn’t get enough of its corny, spirit-ed humor.

What did the rum say to the pineapple on Instagram, you’re the fruit to my spirits, and I’m feeling a little crushed without you.

When I tried to make a rum cake for an Instagram post, it ended up being more of a rum-ble, with flour everywhere and a kitchen that needed a serious clean-up.

In an attempt to spice up my Instagram feed, I started experimenting with rum-infused recipes, and let’s just say my followers were spirits-ed away by the flavors.

I rum-maged through my photo album for the perfect rum-themed Instagram post, but all I found were old pictures of me spirit-edly dancing on tables.

The new rum bar on Instagram was getting a lot of buzz, not just for its spirits, but for its unique cocktails that were truly one-of-a-kind, or should I say, one rum at a time.

What did the rum say when it ran out of Instagram post ideas, I’m all out of spirits, and my feed is looking a little flat.

The rum decided to take a break from social media, but not before posting one last Instagram story that left its followers feeling a little spirit-less.

After posting a picture of my rum collection on Instagram, I got a lot of comments asking about my favorite spirit, and I’d to rum-inate on that for a while.

Why did the rum go to the party and then post about it on Instagram, because it was a real spirit-ed occasion, and everyone had a blast, or should I say, a shot.

The rum-themed party on Instagram was such a hit that it started a whole new spirit of community among its followers, with everyone sharing their favorite rum recipes and stories.

I tried to start a rum-themed Instagram challenge, but it was a bit of a rum-ble, with more people spirit-edly arguing over the rules than actually participating.

What do you call a rum that’s also a good listener and posts inspiring quotes on Instagram, a spirit-ual advisor, and it’s definitely one of a kind.

The rum on Instagram was so popular that it started its own spirit-ed podcast, discussing everything from cocktails to community, and it really took off.

After a long day, there’s nothing like a good rum and Coke to take the edge off, and then posting about it on Instagram to share the relaxation with friends.

Why did the rum post a picture of its ingredients on Instagram, to give its followers a spirit-ed look into what makes it so special, and it really added to its charm.

The rum and Coke on Instagram were in a relationship, but it was a bit of a mixed drink, as in, it was complicated, and not everyone understood it.

When I tried to make a rum-infused dessert for an Instagram post, it ended up being more of a rum-ination on the nature of sweets and spirits, and less of an actual dessert.

What did the rum say to the tonic water on Instagram, you’re the one I want to be mixed with, and let’s make this a spirit-ed partnership.

The rum-themed cafe on Instagram was a real spirit-ed hub, with its unique cocktails and cozy atmosphere making it the perfect spot to relax and unwind.

The rum decided to collaborate with other spirits on Instagram, and together, they created a real spirit-ed community that celebrated all things rum and more.

Why did the rum post about its favorite books on Instagram, to show its followers that it’s not just a spirit, but also a bit of a rum-inator, always thinking deeply.

The rum’s Instagram account was so spirit-ed that it started a movement, encouraging people to come together and celebrate the joy of rum, in all its forms.

I decided to take a rum-tastic road trip and document it all on Instagram, with a different rum-themed stop at every turn, and it was truly the adventure of a lifetime.

What did the rum say when its Instagram account got hacked, I’ve been spirit-ed away, and I don’t know how to get back, but hopefully, my followers will stick with me.

The rum-themed escape room on Instagram was a real challenge, as players had to solve spirit-ed puzzles to escape, and it was quite the rum-ble.

After solving the rum-themed puzzle on Instagram, I felt so spirit-ed that I decided to treat myself to a well-deserved rum and Coke, and post about it, of course.

Why did the rum go to the doctor after posting about its health on Instagram, it had a bit of a hangover from all the spirit-ed celebrations, and needed some advice on how to recover.

The rum’s Instagram post about self-care really resonated

Conclusion

You’ve mastered the art of rum puns, now go ahead, rum-inate on your favorites and share them with friends – they’re sure to be a spirit-lifter! With these puns, you’ll always be in good spirits, so don’t be afraid to pour yourself into the fun and get this rum party started, you’ll be the life of the party!

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Richard J. Gross

Hi, my name is Richard J. Gross and I’m a full-time Airbus pilot and commercial drone business owner. I got into drones in 2015 when I started doing aerial photography for real estate companies. I had no idea what I was getting into at the time, but it turns out that police were called on me shortly after I started flying. They didn’t like me flying my drone near people, so they asked me to come train their officers on the rules and regulations for drones. After that, I decided to start my own drone business and teach others about the safe and responsible use of drones.

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